When you break up with your partner do you clear the stuff that you have at each other's places immediately ...?

Confusing post ahead and highly recommend you to take a coffee so that it helps you with some information digestion.


When you break up with your partner do you clear the stuff that you have at each other's places immediately or leave it and do not bother about it or leave it there and take it as and when you remember what was left behind?


I do not have the tendency to get into such hassle in leaving my stuff behind after a break up. Mostly I will clear it all at once whether it is just a few things to collect or unimportant ones. Basically I feel that once that 'we broke up' it is wiser to clear the stuff so nothing is left hanging or going through the trouble / embarrassment to ask for it, later. Whatever for? Whether it is an amicable break up or not, I will still clear it up because my ex no longer has the responsibilities to keep the stuff I put there nor he is required to safe-keep it or I do not have the 'rights' to do so anymore, in any case he is with someone else in future. So with that thought, I must as well clear everything up just to 'finish our business'.


In fact the worst part of a break up is that if I am the one doing it, I pre-empt a lot of things that might happened thus I will be organising everything to make sure the important stuff are already back in my place before approaching him. Cruel of me? But then, let us be realistic.

Why I blog about this? Well, a girlfriend of mine shared her recent experience with me about her current situation. *no more details about it*

I find that it is not wise at all for any party to help their 'ex' safe-keep anything after a break up, and left the thing there while waiting for them to claim it back in the future. Why bother doing so? Why still keep the responsibility to help to safe-keep the things, even if they asked? Why waste the space? And suppose that you have a new partner with you now and then out of a sudden your kind ex wanted back all the stuff he/she left behind that he/she asked your help to keep. Whether it is a lot or not. But yet, the hassle of gathering everything that was left behind (which you thought at first was only a few but apparently when he/she asked another time about something else, it's not all yet). It is worse if let say this 'ex' is the one that you do not wish to talk too anymore. And, it disturb both you and your new partner's life. All the hassle for nothing.

The point is, breaking up should be done wisely and cleanly (this is what I believe in) so that nothing is left behind which will affect the other party's future well-being. I believe that the only responsibilities left for someone to do after the break up is not as simple as safe-keeping the stuff for them, but to make sure that both party's future well-being is not affected by each other anymore.

In fact, even if I did left something over that I've totally forgotten about and that my ex remind me of that stuff, I would just ask him to throw it away (even if we remain friends) and apologise for didn't clear that up earlier (it is also my responsibility to make sure I didn't disrupt his current life with his partner, if he has one). Seriously, whatever that I have bought before I am pretty sure I can buy it again, even if that stuff has sentimental values. Unless it is so sentimental that you can't live without, then ask for it and make sure nothing is left behind anymore (but then if it is so important, I think you would have pick it up right after the break up). It is not kind to keep stuff at your ex's place and ask for it after 8 months later and still expect the things to be there for you to collect. What if it was thrown away or misplaced somewhere? See the hassle and more heartaches later over 'stuff'?


Am I confusing you? LOL, I think I am as I just wrote this in a blurt.


What do you think?

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GOT BOOBIES?????

I received an email from Alice in Wonderland talking about an unconventional boobies campaign. No, its not about campaigning how big is your breast size and etc, it’s basically an awareness campaign about what boobies will do to you if you do not check on it as often as you should.

She owns this site where you can buy her stuff and donate, as it is Pink Ribbon Products. “Check out our pink ribbon products on sale at our online shop! For every purchase, RM10-15 will be donated to the National Cancer Society of Malaysia (NCSM). “

As Alice quoted, “The core mission of the campaign is to remind young women (and men!) to conduct regular breast self examination i.e. "check your boobies””

Well, in this case if you have boobies (or even if you don’t, guys) you should consider spreading this campaign in your blog to create awareness on how important it is to take good care of our breast, regardless the size (or do a favour for yourself). It’s an amazing God’s creation for human race, to feed their younglings as well as to bring an upmost confidence in women, beautifying their body to the eyes of the beholder. Ok, cut the crap, I mean it is for your own health, or people around you. So we should take good care of it and spread the awareness.

Hold on, did I mention about Breast Cancer Awareness Month for October?

So, we’d like to get more bloggers like you to join this campaign and make a bigger impact in the society. Help spread the word and remind all your friends out there by placing a BOOBICON on your blog! ~ quoted from Alice

Well, do you know you'll get your blog listed in her site as well? Check it here!

So, what have you done before or will do for this Breast Cancer Awareness?

Hutong Dumpling Bar in Melbourne CBD

Last Sunday, before a long walk to SouthBank to check out a place, BH brought me over to HuTong Dumpling Bar in CBD.

I love the dumplings they served there. We were so hungry as we haven't taken any breakfast and the time was 1130am, but the moment when we stepped into the place at about 1145am-1200pm the place was nearly full, downstairs. That was fast!

We ordered 3 dishes but I only managed to take 2 dishes photos and forgetting the last dish, as I was so busy enjoying the delicious dumplings and not to forget their Shao-Long-Pao!

MOI

BH

BH ordered from the special items in Menu, mostly listed with photos of the dishes

Our SHAO LONG PAO!!! Super yummy!!

They even teach you how to eat it!

Wanton with hot chilli.

This is very good but for those who dislike oily food better not go for it, as for me, I love it!

Peering over the chefs inside the kitchen preparing for all the customers

Overall, we had a satisfying 'brunch'.

I just wonder where is the best dumpling restaurant in Malaysia? I had one in Dragon-I and I am quite satisfied with it :D

***sorry you need to click on the topic above link to see the comments, I accidentally set this post without comments link here**

Facebook cracks me up sometime

CHEWAK: is freakingly sleepy but cannot sleep, can someone help

BROTHER: yes, try slapping ur face 5 TIMES!!! 5 TIMES!!!! :P

GOOD FRIEND: if that doesnt work, try knock urself out.. haha :P

My friends are really awesome people even including my brother, LOL. Look what they replied to my status above.

Also, I have setup my twitter to update my Facebook, some application available in FB that can let you update your twitter to your FB status, in a limited amount (according to the application).

SOMEONE message me:

you make so many comments, that my homepage is just full of your comments only.. cant you just make one long comment and stop??

and I replied:

Simple. U can hide me :) or delete me from ur list. Bye

Thus, I got this kind message in my Inbox from someone who recently added me (or became my friend in FB), shown above.

Well, I guess I do spam too much in my Twitter. If you do follow me in http://twitter.com/chewak, and if you think I spam too much on your timeline, it is ok to unfollow me.

Pancake Dessert House in Melbourne

Last weekend, BH brought me to this Pancake Dessert House (once again) to devour the so tasty dish that he loves, which is also my favourite.

Well if you must know, it is at Mid City Arcade on 200 Bourke St (Shop 18 to be precise).

We ordered the below dishes and I must say I love it nonetheless! We tried this Shark Fin Soup, our first time and we like it straight away.

It is in fact an economical food in there where you can get varieties of good food. I think we should stop ordering the same dish all the time and try others as well, if you tried before, do let me know which one taste good yeah.

Yummylicious!!!!

Anyone tried this before?

So anyone can direct me to good food in Melbourne?

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Divorce is everywhere, is marriage truly real nowadays?

When we were young, we were fed by so much fairy tales such as happily ever after or knight in shining amour or even princess in the far-far land. I don’t know about the nursery books nowadays but back then, it teaches everyone about how a couple should live happily ever after, if you notice or still remember.

And thus we grew up hoping for one great love. A love that will completely swept us off our feet and totally left us breathless, with a great hint of happiness forever (if immortality exists).

Well, as we grow we met our first love along the way and thought that this could be our real true love together, forever. But then, it introduced something new to us, “nothing is forever” (even if immortality exists). Thus, we begin our journey in testing and trial of many relationships with fear in us, telling us that it might not last. We have turned skeptical in life and condemned the fairy tales of happiness ever after. And then we asked ourselves, will anything actually last? Will any good stuff / times actually last? Every time we come within reach of break ups we get more and more skeptical as we kill the hope little by little every day.

To spice up the skeptical thoughts from the above, as marriage was introduce eons ago to sealed 2 love birds, on the other hand divorce is replacing it with an amazing momentum that is even faster than any F1 racer.

I begin to see the trend of divorce lately around me in a freaky rate. Do you?

I do feel sad for my friends who are going through it.

With this trend, I do wonder whether is marriage vows still binding and should we even get married? What do you think?

Don’t worry I am not in the midst of mid-life crisis or marriage dilemma. It’s more like what my friends are going through affecting me.

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I am stuck with intensedebate

Many months ago, a lot of you actually complaint about how my intensedebate.com commenting system actually didn’t post your comment after you have submitted few times.

Now, after some new categories and new functions given by intensedebate I just realised that a lot of the comments actually fell under SPAMS folder. Almost 60 comments through the year. Somehow, one advertiser who wishes to advertised on my blog, her comment was swallowed into the spam folder too. The worst part of this is that users of intensedebate wasn’t given the function to check the spam folder to clear or un-spam those. But yeah, now that they gave, I found all of your comments in there. So I had to click unspam one by one to approved it.

I guess from now onwards I will need to check the intensedebate often to avoid a lot of you getting into spam folder. Wonder how their spam system works =_=”

Anyway, thanks to all of you who tried so many times, I felt bad to see how much effort you all put to comment and yet intensedebate decided to swallowed it. LOL. So bad of it.

I hope from now onwards the system is good enough to show everything and that I have the control over it rather than none at all.

I can’t change the commenting system without losing all the wonderful comments from you all, thus I am stuck with intensedebate.

Anyone knows how to backup intensedebate and transfer to blogger.com?

I am losing readers, commentors and followers

......in a very weird way.........

Once I remember I started out blogging planning to blog about my life, my thoughts and events that happened around me, perhaps with a little bit of ranting and musing to spice it up as well. In fact, I’ve so wanted to blog about my relationship, people around me, my co-workers, people I know online and etc. I also wanted to blog about many other personal stuff here. At first, I wanted to go anonymous but after much pondering, I would love to share my life with my close friends who follow my blog. Thus, I started out with bits and pieces of my life, and throw photos to spice up the blog.

As the blog grows so does the readers / visitors. That got me excited on continuing to blog on this blog. I wanted to let it to be personal, however many things in life has changes my way of blogging in here. Although I am no longer anonymous however I have turn my ways of blogging into very general on my personal thoughts. In fact, BH started to lose interest on it as it has turn so less personal and too commercialize. Well, I wouldn’t say it is commercialize per se but it is no longer personal, period.

It’s funny how some topics in my blog attract more readers than topics about me. Such as? Check out this category “Question of life”

If you do wonder why my blog has turn out less personal, here let me share my experience with you.

1. There are friends who came to me telling me please do not blog about them (I do blog about our friendship). Why? Because their girlfriends do not like that I mention about their bf and they get into arguments after reading it, thinking that we still keep in touch. Well, if you do follow my blog you will notice I have blogged about few good guy friends that I have, with certain issue that we need to stay away from each other. Well, honestly I didn’t do anything but I guess the girlfriends just felt threaten with my own existence, that’s all. So out of respect and care of friendship, I stayed away and change my way in blogging.
2. Then, I have readers that wrote to me telling me that they are not able to visit my blog often anymore or no longer can comment, thus they apologize about it. I did ask why. They solemnly share with me about how their girlfriends do not like them reading my blog. It’s like fixated to this person who writes the blog. Seriously! I truly got a few readers sending me that!
3. Then, I have this one reader telling me that “does your partner reads your twitter or blog and do you mind?”. I replied, I don’t mind at all. And asked, why? He simply said that it is a bit uncomfortable if partner does that. I guess, he must be worried on how the partner will take it if he replies to girls or comment on girl’s blog, like mine? Sigh….
4. And then, I have someone who dropped by my blog commenting on my chatbox (it used to be in the blog until some spammers decided to spam it, so I took it out), telling me that I should be aware or be careful of this doctor guy (who has very good comments in fact in my blog), because he tricks young girls. That commenter stays anonymous and never really explains much, so I assumed that she could be his wife? LOL.

Seriously, I think my blog has lost its own personalities after encountering so many issues. It’s like I need to be careful of my writings in fear that my friend’s / reader’s partner may see/read it. It is not like I should becareful if I hurt anyone or BH in my writings. Kinda absurd in many ways.

What do you think? Should I continue my own way of blogging and ignore them? Do you encountered such problems before? I truly never mean any harm to people, you know…. I didn’t even bash or rant about anyone.

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Do you notice anything changes in my blog?

Well, just recently I got myself hook up with Fireworks 8 software and learn the technique of ‘designing’. Wow sounds professional there. Anyway, it is truly fun when you get to learn most of the function and you slowly create the stuff you’ve always wanted to do. One by one, I re-vamp the look and feel of this blog.

Well as you can see, I’ve added nice little looking badges for Twitter, Facebook, RSS and Email at the right side as well as the top 5 posts for you to click on, based on Google search and the most commented.

I even have this small little Welcome board on my blog!

I designed it in a way to portray a little bit of spring feeling as it is spring now in Melbourne. However, I am not quite satisfied with the look yet, so will be tweaking here and there, on and off.

Do you like the look? Or any comments on how to get it better? :D

Happy Spring Time

I just wonder what if I use this as my blog banner? What do you think? I didn't create this, it's more like using lots of images to combine into one........

click to enlarge

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Well you got to love Melbourne for the weather though….

Melbourne’s weather is always crazy in the sense that you can see / feel 4 seasons in one day. I guess some of you may have heard about Sand Storm in Sydney or Hail Storm in Australia recently, last month. Sydney was hit by it. It looks like almost ¼ of the sand from the dessert part of Australia flew over and covered the whole city. I heard some of my friends saying their colleagues need to vacumm their house and etc, a difficult task indeed.

Just like today, I can see the day started with very strong wind and then some rain. Two hours later it started to shine. Sun blazingly on earth and then suddenly there was 10 minutes of heavy rain, this goes through a cycle for the whole day and you wouldn’t know when the rain hits you again. The wind can even blow you away or more like blow your pants off.

Any of you experience the weather here before?